I had the luxury of eaves dropping on 2 women both done up very nicely talking about their job. They simply go to court every 3 months and get a pay increase! Interested in how they do it? Easy they abuse the system and take advantage of the courts seeming need to ignore fathers rights. Previously I mentioned how fathers rights is pretty much a non-existing phenomena. I was very incorrect based on the conversation, the fathers rights are a true fact and apparently include paying for a household which they do not dwell in. Unfair you say? Would it be fair if those 2 women couldn't commit blatant fraud? One of the women lives with someone who I believe I overheard owns 3 plumbing businesses? The other has a boyfriend in jail who is doing time for distribution of crack and something else I missed. She collects the money from his posse and just has to visit him, her childs father works 2 fulltime jobs and pays $1,600. Pretty funny right? The way she was laughing she atleast found it hillarious!
Fathers rights do exsist, I was wrong! Some are extremists on either side of the child custody argument. Fathers rights should be, but are not more of a hot topic especially with so many children born out of wedlock. When I go to court I do not see many verdicts going with" dad" though, even when I see women chewing gum and rolling their eyes when the dads describe a change in their living situation. I remember one couple where the father looked very sharp minus the fact he had a few holes, very scuffed shoes, and asked for a reduction in almost a whisper because he was embarrassed in having a court room hear his story! Talk about humbling, and" Goldy Locks" (she looked like a million bucks, literally flawless) laughed at him. I wanted to scream" Hey Judge, isn't there suppose to be some respect in your court room?". The lady didn't even get a look from the" Honor" (that term is used EXTREMELY loosely). When asked if she was OK with it ( is it not the judges job to judge a situation? Does anyone else hear the whip sound women have over the "justice system" {I still chuckle everytime I hear that}) she literally yelled absolutely not. Guess why, well actually your guess would be as good as mine. Why, after all I was there paying close attention. Easy, she wasn't asked for her reasoning!
Fathers rights are a topic that needs tto be adresses and courts should cease in acting as if they are the sheepish lion when women are involved. I am not trying to put women down as I highly respect single mothers, but rather am severly bothered by the abuse of the system and paying for cowards in robes. Fathers rights need to exsist if our country is as diverse and fair as it attempts to portray itself.
Monday, March 21, 2011
Thursday, October 7, 2010
What is child support?
If you ask anyone involved with a non-profit they'll tell you that time is the most valuable asset they have. Those that give unselfishly and with extreme compassion are the fundamental of any non-profit. In a sense dads act the same way toward their children, when allowed, which makes me wonder why that is hardly taken into account in the courts.
In no way is this a pity trip for dads out there, however why are we still seen as nothing more than walking paychecks? It's as if the courts would rather a single mother raise her child/children while the dads are told to worry about nothing but working. As a dad my most enjoyable moments in life literally involve my children smiling. Be it Owie smiling with ego when he says he's a big brother or Brie smiling when she realizes her input is blatantly desired.
Children need unbiased and unforced involvment from dads as well as moms. It's highly unfair fathers are mearly a tool for financial resources in the eyes of others. Being a single parent is far from easy and I commend those that religiously put out an effort to make things work through a partnership. If a child craves time with a parent why are lines "it's not daddy's day" an acceptable response? I heard today while working a mother withholding her child from seeing his father because he was out of work sick the previous week I believe and couldn't pay her support in full.
If this mindset of entitlement is to continue, will the childrens' best interest ever be considered? How are the times "so different" and how can we say we are "growing in acceptance" as a whole if this is still not adressed? I have known countless fathers who work literally to provide someone elses lifestyle. I do not mind convenience, but if we want what's in the best interest of the children how about this "equation"?
A father who makes no effort at all to see his children, or does not value their time with them should pay a little financially. It's the least he can do, right?
If a dad is told he has to support his child, how about taking the child clothes shopping? Play catch with his child or ride a bike instead of having a need for baby sitters? If need be, have the dads submit what they buy for the children, that is kept at their house. Allow parents to compromise as partners and go through councelling if need be. It would be people could seperate their selfish needs and desires and truly put their children first.
In no way is this a pity trip for dads out there, however why are we still seen as nothing more than walking paychecks? It's as if the courts would rather a single mother raise her child/children while the dads are told to worry about nothing but working. As a dad my most enjoyable moments in life literally involve my children smiling. Be it Owie smiling with ego when he says he's a big brother or Brie smiling when she realizes her input is blatantly desired.
Children need unbiased and unforced involvment from dads as well as moms. It's highly unfair fathers are mearly a tool for financial resources in the eyes of others. Being a single parent is far from easy and I commend those that religiously put out an effort to make things work through a partnership. If a child craves time with a parent why are lines "it's not daddy's day" an acceptable response? I heard today while working a mother withholding her child from seeing his father because he was out of work sick the previous week I believe and couldn't pay her support in full.
If this mindset of entitlement is to continue, will the childrens' best interest ever be considered? How are the times "so different" and how can we say we are "growing in acceptance" as a whole if this is still not adressed? I have known countless fathers who work literally to provide someone elses lifestyle. I do not mind convenience, but if we want what's in the best interest of the children how about this "equation"?
A father who makes no effort at all to see his children, or does not value their time with them should pay a little financially. It's the least he can do, right?
If a dad is told he has to support his child, how about taking the child clothes shopping? Play catch with his child or ride a bike instead of having a need for baby sitters? If need be, have the dads submit what they buy for the children, that is kept at their house. Allow parents to compromise as partners and go through councelling if need be. It would be people could seperate their selfish needs and desires and truly put their children first.
Monday, August 2, 2010
Is It Dad's Turn?
This blog is going to receive a valiant effort from me on a very neglected and unjust topic. This topic isn't spoken of NEARLY as often as it should be, the topic is "Dad's (not fathers) Rights". I have a very personal reason for getting involved in this, the reason being I am a proud dad! It's time our voices as dad's are championed. When parents go to court, mothers (not mom's) have a very good reason to be excited, they're probably walking into an automatic paycheck. Dad's, on the other hand, have an even greater reason to be fearful, we're seen as dollar signs.
When you think of activist, you may, and rightfully so for their great efforts, imagine P.E.T.A., N.A.A.C.P., or a variety of Women's groups. As I asked in my title, what about dad? If we as a country need all these changes for all these groups, so we can't be labeled as "unjust", why aren't the father's mentioned? Imagine our country'spast for a brief moment as you ponder the pure importance of a couple of ideas:
"Go ask your father"
"Dad knows best"
"Wait for your father"
And lastly, when referring to our past, have you ever heard the term "Fore Father's"?
I'll introduce myself and give my story down the road. I ask you comment and share your opinion. I am not saying every father is perfect, far from that actually. A dad is the male who stoops to his child's eye level and speaks to them with the same respect he asks. A dad sacrifices for his children. A dad is who tirelessly listens to glass shattering trumpet practice and feels nothing but pride, dad won't even move for the ear plugs. As I grow in age, I see who my dad and grandpa's are (and in one sad case were). They are the hero's I can only try to become. I do swear to anyone who'll ask, there is absolutely nothing or anyone I can ever put before my children, including my own needs and wishes, there is no possibility. I am sternly positive I am far from the only one who feels this way. To my fellow dad's, congratulations and do not stop. Our roads are a little tougher generally, but when we get those can't hide it smiles from our children, our effort has been paid back.
When you think of activist, you may, and rightfully so for their great efforts, imagine P.E.T.A., N.A.A.C.P., or a variety of Women's groups. As I asked in my title, what about dad? If we as a country need all these changes for all these groups, so we can't be labeled as "unjust", why aren't the father's mentioned? Imagine our country'spast for a brief moment as you ponder the pure importance of a couple of ideas:
"Go ask your father"
"Dad knows best"
"Wait for your father"
And lastly, when referring to our past, have you ever heard the term "Fore Father's"?
I'll introduce myself and give my story down the road. I ask you comment and share your opinion. I am not saying every father is perfect, far from that actually. A dad is the male who stoops to his child's eye level and speaks to them with the same respect he asks. A dad sacrifices for his children. A dad is who tirelessly listens to glass shattering trumpet practice and feels nothing but pride, dad won't even move for the ear plugs. As I grow in age, I see who my dad and grandpa's are (and in one sad case were). They are the hero's I can only try to become. I do swear to anyone who'll ask, there is absolutely nothing or anyone I can ever put before my children, including my own needs and wishes, there is no possibility. I am sternly positive I am far from the only one who feels this way. To my fellow dad's, congratulations and do not stop. Our roads are a little tougher generally, but when we get those can't hide it smiles from our children, our effort has been paid back.
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